Before I get started, I'd like to take a second to recognize that Two by Truth is officially a year old! Thanks to everyone who has read the blog, left encouraging comments, etc. We've really enjoyed working on this, and frankly... I'm pleasantly surprised that we've stuck with it for so long. No project abandonment here!
In thinking about this 1-year anniversary, it has occurred to me that the general premise behind this blog is shifting. This is not because of anything W or I have consciously done, but rather just the currents of our lives changing. Of course, this blog started out as a voice for two twins on decidedly different journeys. Yet, these days it seems our journeys are looking more and more similar. I hope that doesn't bother anyone!
It's really bizarre, actually, the similarities in our lives at the moment. But, is that surprising? Probably not. So, I thought I'd compose this post as a little ode to my "twinny" and to the Creator who "determines our steps" (Proverbs 16:9). I feel so blessed that W and I have parallel paths (at the moment at least) and I think He deserves some praise for this blessing!
Growing up as a twin is a very strange thing. Well, at least that's what I've determined in retrospect. At the time, I suppose W and I thought that our experience was the norm, as it was all we knew. From the very beginning we were best friends (save that fateful 8th grade year) and to this day I consider my relationship with W something that is indescribable to the singleton set. How do you describe a relationship that most of the world has absolulely no idea about? There does not exist a word that defines this bond... it's not friend, it's not sister... perhaps "soulmate" is as good as it gets. Yet, even our contemporary ideas of what a "soulmate" is are not good enough for what my twin is. Perhaps, twinship is the perfect definition of "soulmate" where all romantic inclinations of the word inevitably fall short. It is weird and beautiful to think that W and I literally were once one being... I suppose, one soul.
Yet, this has caused some confusion and questioning at various points in my life. For example, I hate that elementary school sentiment that "everyone is like a unique snowflake... no two are alike." Oh okay. Well where does that leave me!? haha Growing up, sometimes I feared that being an identical twin meant that one or both of us weren't "supposed" to exist... like our spontaneous split in utero meant that while everyone else came about because God wanted them and needed exactly them on earth, W or I just came about randomly and now there's two where perhaps there was only meant to be one. I know that is totally dumb and untrue, but as a kid, sometimes that's what I thought in light of others' sentiments about God creating us to be "uniquely you," as they say.
I have always thought of the verse in Psalms where it talks about being "knit together" as talking about us. In reality, David is talking about God knitting just him together, but I absolutely think that W and I were "knit together" as well... both within ourselves (as David was) and with each other. And how cool... take a look at the verse that follows:
"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." (Psalm 139:13-14)
Now I'm more of the mind that W and I are so awesome that one of us just wouldn't do. haha! But really, I take comfort in the fact that God knit us together and He made both of us wonderfully for purposes that perhaps only we could fulfill both individually and collectively.
And now, I'm just in awe of how God is using both of us in similar ways and how He has provided for us emotionally and spiritually in each other on our parallel paths. It's almost like we keep leapfrogging along the same path... one ahead of another and on and on and on. Those of you who know us personally are aware that we have not lived together since high school... we've been separated for 7 years and counting. (That is crazy to me!) But, check out this series of events since we've been "on our own": we both started college as theatre majors in Ohio... then W moved south and set her sights on serving in the non-profit arena. Then I had a brief stint in Teach for America... and W moved back up North. Then I moved south and started in educational programming in non-profit... and W had her brief stint in Teach for America. Then W got married to a nice blond-haired, blue-eyed Chrristian boy...and I started dating a nice blond-haired, blue-eyed Christian boy. Then, W plans to move back to the south and work in educational programming in non-profit... and I just might marry this guy. And all of a sudden our paths are like... the same. It's very strange. Not to mention our journeys of faith being on the same trajectory as well.
I've been reflecting on all of this because, honestly, W and I have not intentionally or consciously tried to make our lives mirror each other. We really haven't. I was convinced for a long time that W would live in Tennessee and work with the blind and I would live in NYC and be a theatre professor. Yet, God had other plans for us and it is in His perfection that He has led us to where we are today. I think that is really cool... because here we are facing our own challenges and trials, and in this "leapfrog" effect, one of us nearly always has a tour guide of sorts in the other. It is an incredible blessing and not one that I think is coincidental or random.
So on this day I just praise God for this blessing! I am well aware that my relationship with W is something that very, very few people get to call their own and, for this, I am so very thankful that God appointed the two of us to share this bond. I also know that perhaps this "leapfrogging" through life won't last forever, so while it does, I will share my wisdom and insight with W earnestly and truthfully and pray that she does the same for me. Our God provides for us individually in the ways in which we need it... and He's funny, sometimes, isn't He?
Well I'm sure glad that both of you exist. :D
ReplyDeleteM and W,
ReplyDeleteI can only imagine what the remarkable woman who gave you life went through. Weight gain, hair loss, insomnia, heartburn, severe morning sickness, gestational diabetes, 2 months of 24/7 bed rest......
Her strength and determination to see your multiple birth through shows incredible, amazing....well, just let me say once again, she must be remarkable! What a delight it must be for her to know how grateful you are to be twins and how much you enjoy it . She must love you !
signed,
Mom. :)