Regarding T's Job and my Struggle with Patience

It's W again! Alive and well and enjoying the fact that it's still summer in Chicago.

You know what I'm not enjoying? T's job.

I don't know how much I have discussed with you all the circumstances of T's job or how it affects our relationship. Here's a brief run-down:

-T works as an investment banking analyst with a boutique firm here in Chicago focused on M & A work in the automotive and industrials industries.
-Consistent with most IB analysts, he works anywhere from 80-115 hours a week. Yes, you read that correctly.
-On an average night, he gets home between 2 and 3 in the morning, only to get up, shower, and return to work by 8:30am.
-He typically works at least 10 hours over the course of Saturday and Sunday on most weekends.
-He is always on-call, meaning that at ANY time, his bosses can call him into work and he must report.

Sounds miserable, right? It's actually a highly sought-after career choice because the compensation is high, as is the prestige level and it apparently sets a person up pretty well for future endeavors.

What this means for me? I miss my husband. I can never make plans. I never know when he's going to be home, and if he is home, how often he'll stay here. I start preparing for work at 7am so this means, in a typical 24-hour period, our paths cross for roughly 4 hours in the middle of the night when I have already been asleep for hours and he is a walking zombie as he crashes into bed.

I say this not to elicit pity, because we all know than I signed up for this. I entered into this marriage knowing full-well that for at least another year, this would be our reality. I say this to help give context for you to understand how the Lord is using this situation to teach me patience.

After a year of teaching first grade, I thought I was THROUGH learning about patience. I thought it wouldn't be possible for me to ever be in a situation again that required more patience. Well, folks, I've been back in Chicago for just over a week and the patience train is calling me to hop aboard.

I hate being patient. As much as I don't like to admit it, I am a big fan of instant gratification. I want what I want and I want it NOW. I don't like to wait, and I certainly don't like to wait while it's uncomfortable and painful.

But in this season of patience (both waiting for T to come home each night and waiting for the days when he has a job with more normal hours), the Lord is teaching me many things:

1. Again, that my life is not all about me.
2. That I need to lean on Him for my fulfillment and joy.
3. That He has made me capable of more than I would've believed a year ago (T's not available to help me dig my car out of the snow? T's not available to assemble the desk from Office Depot? Guess that's my job now!)
4. That the love of God can be felt so closely through the connections I have with my wonderfully supportive friends and family members.
5. That I need to trust in the truth that He has made everything beautiful in His own time.

So, that's what I'm learning. And I HATE that I have to learn it because I'd rather have a husband who is home at 6pm to eat dinner and help me do the dishes, to watch TV with me and talk about our days and cuddle before bed, etc. But that isn't our season right now, so I'm trying to accept these lessons as a blessing for this time.